Why Wait?

Mango dress (similar)
Zara sandals (similar)
Ellen James handbag
RayBan sunglasses
Linjer rings (c/o)
Location: Saint-Boniface Cathedral – Winnipeg, Manitoba

It might seem a bit odd to share an outfit featuring bare arms, bare legs and sandals in the first week of November. And it’s true that this is definitely not what I’m wearing currently, even under the coat that I need at this time of year. But why wait? That’s a question that’s come up for me more and more often lately. I’m a planner by nature. Meticulous and detailed. I like to consider every possible option and contingency before I take action. In some ways, it serves me well. But it also means I spend a lot of time waiting for perfect moments that will likely never come. And if the last two years has taught me anything, it’s that moments and opportunities, however imperfect, are never guaranteed. If you have one, you should probably take it. But sometimes it’s more complicated than that.

The question why wait isn’t just about the timing of this post. It’s about the outfit, too. This look isn’t a particularly special or inventive one – I’m just wearing a black dress. But the black dress is significant. For years, I wouldn’t have dreamed of wearing a dress like this, because I didn’t think I had the body for it. But what makes a certain body appropriate for a specific type of garment, aside from arbitrary beauty standards set mostly to appease men? Nothing, as far as I know. What I was waiting for wasn’t the right body so much as the feeling of confidence in my body that would allow me to step out in this type of dress. There was a pretty notable event in my life that gave me that confidence boost.

And so, here I am at thirty-six, finally wearing a minidress and feeling good in it. I know why I waited this long to allow myself to feel good in it, and the reason isn’t just about arbitrary beauty standards, although they never fail to infuriate me. Those standards are based on what pleases men and if I’d worn this outfit a year earlier, the amount of negative attention that would have come with it would have made me miserable. So, why wait? Sometimes the answer is, out of a sense of self-preservation. 

Why wait? Sometimes, to save yourself and your sanity. But sometimes, there’s no reason to. It’s true I wore this outfit over the summer and could save the photos until they’re more seasonal, but by next summer I’ll have moved on to a different kind of look that I’m excited about. This year, I was excited about this one, so here it is – months later, completely weather inappropriate but still satisfying. It’s not the perfect time to share it, but it’s as good a time as any.

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