Wedding Guest

Wilfred dress (similar)
Dune London mules (c/o)
& Other Stories handbag
Hart and Stone necklaces (c/o) (similar)
Linjer ring (c/o) (similar)
Maris Pearl Co. earrings (similar)
Location: Osborne Village – Winnipeg, Manitoba

It had been a while since I last went to a wedding. There was a lovely but fairly chaotic period in my late twenties when all of my close friends got married seemingly at once. At the time, my closet was full of bridesmaid dresses that I definitely never rewore. It was fun, but I can’t truly say that I missed all of the showers and bachelorette parties and dress shopping when it was all over.

It wasn’t until years later that I first went to a wedding as a regular guest. That, I confess, was pretty fun – all I had to do was dress up, show up and enjoy the party. No complaints.

Everything is a little bit different now, weddings included. In May, I received a digital wedding invitation from my cousin and very dear friend, Lucy, who lives in the Dominican Republic. The wedding date was only three weeks away. And the celebration would be entirely virtual for Canadian guests, most of whom likely would have been flying south for the occasion under different circumstances. We’d planned to do exactly that, despite not knowing when it would realistically be possible.

The circumstances weren’t different and life goes on, in spite of the pandemic. I don’t know what I would have done if I’d found myself in the position to make the kind of choice that so many couples now face: to host your wedding on a planned date but have the celebration look entirely different than you imagined, or to wait for some unknown future time when you might be able to have the wedding you envisioned. It was hard enough not to be able to be there to celebrate with someone who has been such an important part of literally my entire life (see Exhibit A.) I can only guess what it must be like to ultimately decide to go ahead with a wedding knowing that even your parents will only be able to witness it via Zoom.

But – the wedding was such a beautiful experience. Its true that we didn’t get to be there in person. But we spent the day preparing just like we would have for any other wedding. We dressed up, took pictures, drank champagne and really made it a party. When choosing my outfit, I tried to imagine what I might have worn if I were really there, looking out on the beach and dancing in the warm tropical air. I could just see myself taking off these Dune London mules and carrying them while I walked along the sand.

That didn’t happen, of course. I still loved imagining that it could.

Even imagining what might have been was fun. Yes, we sat in my office on my couch and watched the celebration happen on my laptop screen. It didn’t matter – it still turned out to be a wonderful highlight in an otherwise pretty dull year. And it made me realise just how much we’ve been missing by putting off celebrating big moments until, “after the pandemic.” We don’t really know when after may come. Or what it will look like. And in the meantime, we’re depriving ourselves of much needed joy. Whatever the occasion, and however it needs to be done, there truly is no time like the present to celebrate. Life, as they say, is the occasion.

There will, I’m sure, be another wedding celebration for Lucy and Benito. One that looks more like we traditionally think of wedding celebrations, with balloons and a cake and a room full of people dancing. But we could still be waiting a while for that. And in the meantime, their virtual wedding was perfect way to live a little and celebrate the fact that there is still so much of life we can enjoy, if we just get creative.

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